Monday, April 30, 2007
Working with Feedback: MORF
Feedback. I have taught classes on feedback. I study cause and effect and try to be "on" to feedback that is non-verbal.
Yet, alas, I still miss the signals sometimes. And when negative feedback comes in, especially when it's a surprise, I notice that it can really bother me. I wouldn't have admitted that in public years ago but one of the physician leaders I most admire shared the same thing recently.
He was talking about publishing research and how it takes a thick skin to present even the most solid findings to peers, as there is always someone who will slice into you for ill-formed ideas or worse. He said after publishing and presenting hundreds of papers that it still hurts to get bad feedback.
I got some mixed reviews for a public workshop I did for the Fire Service Leadership Academy with the University of Utah's Continuing Education department. I spend a lot more time doing one-on-one coaching and I prefer to teach smaller, more intimate groups. I know my voice doesn't project well in a larger room, so I'll have to start using a microphone, but that's minor.
While I got plenty of good marks, and many wanted to spend more time on the material, I also had some comments about cutting some participants off. Ouch. A class on feedback and some felt cut off. Room for growth for sure, especially when it comes to larger audiences.
What I'm spending more time reflecting on is how hard it was to see or include the good feedback given some of the negative feedback.
I noticed how tempting it was to tilt a bit off-center because I wished I had had more perfect scores. I started to slip into that perfectionistic hole of being angry with myself, worried about what my sponsor at Continuing Ed was feeling, etc.
It took effort to use my own process of MORFing the situation, as in "what do I want more of for myself, for others, for the relationships, and for the future?" This process always transforms negative energy, so I took a deep breath and considered what I really wanted.
What I want more of for myself is to learn more about sequencing learning modules, so I don't end up feeling rushed to make a particular point during a workshop.
What I want for others is for them to have a more organized learning experience and never feel cut off.
What I want for the relationships centers on creating a stronger sense of inclusion and trust.
And, what I want for the future is to keep bringing this powerful body of work on conversations to more people in ever more skillful ways.
If I haven't said it recently enough, I come to this work honestly and consider it life work to continue to deepen my capacity to teach myself as well as others!
Yet, alas, I still miss the signals sometimes. And when negative feedback comes in, especially when it's a surprise, I notice that it can really bother me. I wouldn't have admitted that in public years ago but one of the physician leaders I most admire shared the same thing recently.
He was talking about publishing research and how it takes a thick skin to present even the most solid findings to peers, as there is always someone who will slice into you for ill-formed ideas or worse. He said after publishing and presenting hundreds of papers that it still hurts to get bad feedback.
I got some mixed reviews for a public workshop I did for the Fire Service Leadership Academy with the University of Utah's Continuing Education department. I spend a lot more time doing one-on-one coaching and I prefer to teach smaller, more intimate groups. I know my voice doesn't project well in a larger room, so I'll have to start using a microphone, but that's minor.
While I got plenty of good marks, and many wanted to spend more time on the material, I also had some comments about cutting some participants off. Ouch. A class on feedback and some felt cut off. Room for growth for sure, especially when it comes to larger audiences.
What I'm spending more time reflecting on is how hard it was to see or include the good feedback given some of the negative feedback.
I noticed how tempting it was to tilt a bit off-center because I wished I had had more perfect scores. I started to slip into that perfectionistic hole of being angry with myself, worried about what my sponsor at Continuing Ed was feeling, etc.
It took effort to use my own process of MORFing the situation, as in "what do I want more of for myself, for others, for the relationships, and for the future?" This process always transforms negative energy, so I took a deep breath and considered what I really wanted.
What I want more of for myself is to learn more about sequencing learning modules, so I don't end up feeling rushed to make a particular point during a workshop.
What I want for others is for them to have a more organized learning experience and never feel cut off.
What I want for the relationships centers on creating a stronger sense of inclusion and trust.
And, what I want for the future is to keep bringing this powerful body of work on conversations to more people in ever more skillful ways.
If I haven't said it recently enough, I come to this work honestly and consider it life work to continue to deepen my capacity to teach myself as well as others!
# posted by Cindy Marteney @ 6:18 PM 
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